Friday, September 2, 2011

12 years ago....15 missions trips and 10 countries later

Around this time 12 years ago I was returning from my first mission’s trip to Zimbabwe, Africa. Little did I know that it would mess me up for the rest of my life. At the age of 13 years old, I remember standing with my dad, older sister and older brother in an orphanage full of little African kids and hearing from God for the first very clear and very profound time in my life. He told me “this was what you were made for,” and I knew in my heart that he meant international missions. At the time and partially even now, I'm still figuring out what exactly that entails. Short-term trips or living in a foreign country doing full-time ministry? Will I forever be GOING or will there be a point when I’m called to support and send other missionaries? Regardless of the details, I knew at that time that I was supposed to go. 12 years ago, God gave me a passion and an undeniable urgency in my heart to travel the world and share His love and that’s what I’ve done. 15 mission’s trips and 10 countries later, my passion for spreading God’s love internationally hasn’t diminished but has only fueled the flame for more. I pray for bigger dreams, better visions, and many more moments of being uncomfortable for Jesus.

As soon as I hit the ground in California I was swept off into busy land again. Not in a routine right away but I was in a fun, “see everyone” busy mode. I dropped the ball on blogging my last 3 countries and literally didn’t move my luggage from its spot by my front door for probably 3 weeks. I have so many mixed emotions these days. I was such a trooper until I had to start unpacking my bags. Who would have thought putting away a head lamp could make someone cry like a baby. That trusty little light was probably my most used and valued item on this trip (besides my bible and passport).

Now that I’m in the full swing of work and school again, it’s becoming hard again. I remember crying on my trip before I ever even got back to America praying that I never return to a routine and become completely comfortable again. Every day on my trip I was forced to rely 150% on God. I was put in uncomfortable situations and stretched physically and mentally on a consistent basis. I remember realizing that this trip was so amazing and adventurous and I felt the closest to God that I’d ever been because I always had to look to him for advice or insight on what to do next. I was put in situations where I sat and waited to see him move because there was literally nothing I could do. I was afraid to come home and lose that because in our comfort zones, we tend to consult God less because we don’t feel the need for His help. We are more independent and not dependant on Him. I hate that. So this is me determining not to give into comfort. I’m very blessed at home but I’m not letting myself slip into missing opportunities to, like Ruby and I said in the Philippines, get “dirty for Jesus.”

And…..I promise…..for all those who don’t have direct contact with me all the time, I WILL finish blogging my trip! My next blog will be what I did in the last part of my trip. Thanks for being patient!

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